Sunday, October 20, 2013

I miss you, Poppy.

Dear Poppy,

You left this Earth on October 23, 2011.

I have never forgotten not one second of that day.

And I never will.



This is for you, Poppy.




When I Get Where I'm going - Brad Paisley and Dolly Parton

When I get where I'm going
On the far side off the sky
The first thing that I'm gonna do
Is spread my wings and fly

I'm gonna land beside a lion
And run my fingers through his mane
Or I might find out what it's like
To ride a drop of rain

Yeah when I get where I'm goin
There'll be only happy tears
I will shed the sins and struggles
I have carried all these years
And I'll leave my heart wide open
I will love and have no fear
Yeah when I get where I'm going
Don't cry for me down here

I'm gonna walk with my grand daddy
And he'll match me step for step
And I'll tell him how I missed him
Every minute since he left
Then I'll hug his neck


Yeah when I get where I'm goin
There'll be only happy tears
I will she'd the sins and struggles
I have carried all these years
And I'll leave my heart wide open
I will love and have no fear
Yeah when I get where I'm going
Don't cry for me down here

So much pain and so much darkness
In this world we stumble through
All these questions I can't answer
So much work to do

But when I get where I'm going
And I see my maker's face
I'll stand forever in the light
Of his amazing grace
Yeah when I get where I'm goin
Oh When I get where I'm goin
There'll be only happy tears
Hallelujah
I will love and have no fear
When I get where I'm going
Yeah when I get where I'm going



I love you Poppy, forever and always.

~Love Sydney

Saturday, September 28, 2013

Fruit of The Spirit - Day 5, 6, 7, 8, & 9! - Mega post!

So...I...Uh...Haven’t posted since the 11th... I missed every day in the Fruit of the Spirit, so I am going to put them all into one mega post!!!



First off is...

Kindness!!


Being Kind means you are really caring, and nice, and help others! Here is a definition of the word “Kind” Or “Kindness”:
kindness [kahynd-nis]  noun


1. the state or quality of being kind: kindness to animals.


2. a kind act; favor: his many kindnesses to me.


3. kind behavior: I will never forget your kindness.


4. friendly feeling; liking.



kind (kīnd) adj. kind·er, kind·est


1. Of a friendly, generous, or warm-hearted nature.


2. Showing sympathy or understanding; charitable: a kind word.


3. Humane; considerate: kind to animals.


4. Forbearing; tolerant: Our neighbor was very kind about the window we broke.


5. Generous; liberal: kind words of praise.






God wants us to be Kind to people, even our enemies, because it would show them His love, and His grace.






I usually say “There’s lots of verses about -Fruit of the Spirit-”  so I’m going to make it a LITTLE different... ;)


There is like thousands to millions of verses about Kindness in the Bible.


Here are a few good ones:


Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. Ephesians 4:32 (NASB)



Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (NIV)


Yes I know that’s about Love, but it does have “Kind” in it. ;)



The merciful man does himself good, But the cruel man does himself harm. Proverbs 11:17 (NASB)





So you see, Kindness is a great thing to be, in-fact, I think there’s something about Kindness in the Beatitudes...

Well, I mean it doesn’t say “Blessed are those who are Kind” But it DOES mean Kindness.


“Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy. Matthew 5:7 (NASB)




Yes it says merciful, but read this quote:


"Being merciful and kindness Let’s go to the next Beatitude. ‘Blessed are the merciful.’ The corresponding fruit of the Spirit is kindness. We can see right away that these two words are very close in meaning. In the NT, we often find them together. Take for example Titus 3:4 where Paul speaks about the ‘kindness of God.’ Then in the following verse, we read that God saved us according to His mercy. Or take Ephesians 2:7. It is a verse about God’s kindness toward us. And in Ephesians 2:4, we are told that God is rich in mercy. In 1Peter 2:3, Peter speaks about ‘tasting the kindness of the Lord.’ And a few verses later, in v. 10, he says that ‘the people of God have obtained mercy.’ There is obviously an internal connection between the words ‘kindness’ and ‘mercy.’ One is simply the consequence of the other."






See? So be kind and merciful to one another!


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Second off is...

Goodness!!!

This is a definition of the word “Good” Or “Goodness”:




goodness [good-nis] noun


1. the state or quality of being good.


2. moral excellence; virtue.


3. kindly feeling; kindness; generosity.


4. excellence of quality: goodness of workmanship.


5. the best part of anything; essence; strength.



God wants us to be good, without sin, but we are imperfect, and it’s really hard to be perfect like Jesus, but the best way to be good is to:


Avoid temptation, (easier said then done, because temptation can come in many different ways and we may not even notice what is happening.)


Listen to God,

Pray and ask God to forgive our sins.



(I know, this is a little list, I tried to think of lots of things but these were the only ones I could think of)


But please do not get frustrated because you tried these things and you still sin, we cannot be ABSOLUTELY PERFECT, it is simply impossible on this Earth, (however, we will be perfect in Heaven, where this is no sin) but Jesus died on the cross to pay the penalty for our sins, so be glad, Jesus saved you!




There IS A LOT of verses about Goodness in the Bible.


And here are a few:




And He said, “I Myself will make all My goodness pass before you, and will proclaim the name of the Lord before you; and I will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and will show compassion on whom I will show compassion.” Exodus 33:19



Now may the Lord show lovingkindness and truth to you; and I also will show this goodness to you, because you have done this thing. 2 Samuel 2:6



Surely goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life, And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. Psalm 23:6



Be Good as best you can! (AND...Do not get frustrated if your not perfect! No one is, except our Lord! And don’t worry, you will be perfect in Heaven!) 


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Third off is...

Faithfulness!!!!

You have probably heard of Faithfulness before...

Here is a definition of “Faithful” Or “Faithfulness”:




faithful [feyth-fuhl] adjective


1. strict or thorough in the performance of duty: a faithful worker.




2. true to one's word, promises, vows, etc.


3. steady in allegiance or affection; loyal; constant: faithful friends.


4. reliable, trusted, or believed.


5. adhering or true to fact, a standard, or an original; accurate: a faithful account; a faithful copy.



God wants us to be Faithful to Him, meaning He wants us to be loyal to Him, (don’t worship false gods!) He wants us to pray to him, (Evening and Morning and at Noon I will pray and cry aloud and He shall hear my voice -Psalms 55:17)



He wants us to confess our sins to Him, He wants us to be kind, and gentle, and have self control(Fruits of the Spirit -Galatians 5:22-23) God is also Faithful to us, His Children.


There are lots of verses in the bible about Faithfulness, and here are a few of them:




3 Surely he will save you

from the fowler’s snare

and from the deadly pestilence.

4 He will cover you with his feathers,

and under his wings you will find refuge;

his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.

5 You will not fear the terror of night,

nor the arrow that flies by day,

6 nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,

nor the plague that destroys at midday. Psalm 91:3-6 (NIV)



And he passed in front of Moses, proclaiming, “The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness Exodus 34:6



May the Lord now show you kindness and faithfulness, and I too will show you the same favor because you have done this. 2 Samuel 2:6



For I have always been mindful of your unfailing love and have lived in reliance on yourfaithfulness. Psalm 26:3




Be Faithful to the Lord your God! 



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Fourth off is...

Gentleness!!!!!

Being gentle means that...Say you rescued a little baby bird that was laying on the ground, and you took care of it gently, and then you went to set it free, you set it down gently, and it flew away.


Here is a definition of the word “Gentle” Or “Gentleness”:




gen·tle [jen-tl] adjective, gen·tler, gen·tlest, verb, gen·tled, gen·tling.


adjective


1. kindly; amiable: a gentle manner.


2. not severe, rough, or violent; mild: a gentle wind; a gentle tap on the shoulder.



That is how God wants us to be. (not severe rough or violent) So be Gentle with all your heart. :)



There are lots of verses about Gentleness in the Bible...


One of my favorites is in the Beatitudes...

“Blessed are the [d]gentle, for they shall inherit the earth. Matthew 5:5 (NASB)


And here’s some more:


You have also given me the shield of Your salvation, And Your right hand upholds me; And Your gentleness makes me great. Psalm 18:35


But flee from these things, you man of God, and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, perseverance and gentleness. 1 Timothy 6:11



A gentle answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1


God wants us to be gentle, because Jesus was.


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FIFTH off is...

Self control!!!!!!


Self control means that you have control over what you do, and what you say, for some people it’s really hard, but ask God for help with self control, and He will help, even if it doesn’t seem like your getting anywhere, just trust Him.


Or as the Apostle John puts it:

"Fundamentally, self-control is the ability or power to rule or regulate one’s personal life so that we are neither driven nor dominated, as the apostle John puts it, by the desires of the flesh, the desires of the eyes, or the pride of life (1 John 2:16; see also Gal. 5:19-21). These three, passion, pleasure, and pride, are those forces in the heart of man that energize his behavior patterns. It is to these inner forces that Satan and a fallen world appeal in order to promote a way of life that seeks to exist apart from God. The essence of such self-regulation is the ability to delay or refuse an impulse in the service of biblical truth, values, beliefs, and objectives.


Self-control means to be in control of one’s attitudes or thought processes, desires or passions, and patterns or habits so they do not dictate one’s behavior. Speaking scripturally, self-control is a matter of the control of the self-life from within by spiritual means, i.e., by God’s weapons of spiritual warfare as described in the Word of God (2 Cor. 10:3-5; Eph. 6:10-18; Col. 2:20-23)."



There are so many good verses about self control in the Bible, and here are a few good ones:


For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7 (NLT)


For the grace of God has appeared that offers salvation to all people. It teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age, while we wait for the blessed hope—the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all wickedness and to purify for himself a people that are his very own, eager to do what is good. Titus 2:11-14 (NIV)



His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature, having escaped the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.

For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love. 8 For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 2 Peter 1:3-8 (NIV)






So, do your best to have Self control, and if you have trouble, just ask God for help. :)


Love fiercely, Have Joy, Have Peace, Have Patience, Give Kindness, Have Goodness, Have Faithfulness, Have Gentleness, and Have Self Control. 






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But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. Galatians 5:22-23 (NASB)



Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Fruit of the Spirit - Day 3 & 4 - Peace & Patience

Yup, I missed 2 days. So day 3 and 4 will be in the same post!!! I will put them in different parts though, (putting dashes to separate them)


First off is, Peace!


Peace means “relaxation”

For example, “I love when it is peaceful in my crazy life.” (Everyone loves it when its peaceful, am I right? :) I know I do!)


There’s lots of verses on Peace. (It deserves a darker, more calming color. ;))


That you will do us no harm, just as we have not touched you and have done to you nothing but good and have sent you away in peace. You are now the blessed of the Lord.’" Genesis 26:29 (NASB)


If you do this thing and God so commands you, then you will be able to endure, and all these people also will go to their place in peace.” Exodus 18:23 (NASB)


(The best ones I could find!)


Anyway, Peace is a great feeling... Imagine total and complete relaxation, what makes you relaxed? Laying on a beach, listening to the waves? Or, just sitting in your backyard, watching the wind blow the leaves? Whatever it is, just imagine yourself in your Peaceful place. Pray for Peace if it’s hectic.


There isn’t many words to explain Peace, but, it’s a GREAT time to Pray. :) Not that you shouldn’t pray in hectic times. Because you should. Just saying. ;)






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Second off...


Patience. (Fitting color, am I right?)


Patience means you are not easily angered when something takes a long time. For example, pretend your at a restaurant, and your ABSOLUTELY STARVING!! Are you angry? Or are you patient?


Patient can also mean your at the doctors office waiting for the doctor... BUT THAT’S SCARY. SO... Let’s change the subject!


God wants you to have patience because what if your trying to tell someone about Jesus, and they don’t KNOW EVERYTHING in five seconds? Do you get angry that they didn’t learn everything in five seconds? Or do you let them go at their own pace?






But if your impatient, DO NOT WORRY! God still loves you! And always will! Pray for patience, there’s a verse that says:


Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. Matthew 7:7 (NIV)






Ta-da! Anyway, Pray for patience. :)






That’s all for now, SEE YOU TOMORROW WITH THE NEXT FRUIT OF THE SPIRIT!!!






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Monday, September 9, 2013

Fruit of the Spirit - Day 2 - Joy



Yeah, this may seem like cheating because I posted in the middle of the night... BUT TECHNICALLY, I posted YESTERDAY. So... :)


Anyway, today's Fruit of the Spirit is... Joy!

 



Joy is when your REALLY REALLY HAPPY AND EXCITED!

Joy is a WONDERFUL feeling! Think of it like this...:

Say a friend, or a family member has been really ill for a long time, but then you learn they will be OKAY, do you feel sad? NO! You feel COMPLETE Joy!


Or even think of it like this...

If you were there the day Jesus comes back, will you just be mad? NO! You will be JOYFUL! Wanna know why? Well, BECAUSE THE TRUE KING HAS COME! :) Would that just be so exciting?! To see Jesus face to face?! That would be awesome!


There is lots of verses about joy in the bible...:


He will yet fill your mouth with laughter and your lips with shouts of joy. Job 8:21 (NIV)


As the time when the Jews got relief from their enemies, and as the month when their sorrow was turned into joy and their mourning into a day of celebration. He wrote them to observe the days as days of feasting and joy and giving presents of food to one another and gifts to the poor. Esther 9:22 (NIV)



May we shout for joy over your victory and lift up our banners in the name of our God. May the Lord grant all your requests. Psalm 20:5 (NIV)


The precepts of the Lord are right, giving joy to the heart. The commands of the Lord are radiant, giving light to the eyes. Psalm 19:8 (NIV)






Well, those are the best verses I could find about Joy. :)


I can't really explain Joy in words, it's an amazing feeling, total and complete Joy. :)






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VERSE OF THE DAY

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. Galatians 5:22-23 (NASB)


Sunday, September 8, 2013

Those PRICELESS moments.



I bet you've all had those moments, the ones you never want to forget, to cherish for the rest of your life. I have those two.. And I remember them all....


One was where I was swimming in the pool at my old house, then I handed my Grandpa a small plastic penguin that he gave me, and I asked him to keep the penguin safe so that it wouldn't sink. I still have that penguin.


Another was also at my old house, a long time ago, I was swinging, and then I saw some fire ants in the sand and I went over to see them, I was so fasinated by them, and I don't know why.


I remember how sad I was to move, and I remember showing the people who were going to move in, the whole upstairs, including my bedroom.


I remember making little beds on the floor with my family and watching movies.


I remember the day me and my cousin went swimming, we got lots of photos taken... I barely see her now, I miss chatting with her and playing with her so much... I remember the day we played hide-n-go seek with our ds' with a little chat thing so we could find eachother...


Why do these days come and go so fast?

A beautiful song....



Yeah, yeah. I know, I just posted a minute ago... ;)


But I just NEEDED to post this beautiful song!


Restore - Christ August



And here's my favorite part:

"I know your feeling like it's falling apart, and it can't go on anymore. But God is a God who knows how to heal, so just give it up to the Lord, and He will restore."


Ok... I have another...

"The enemy tries to come and divide, trying to get us to give up the fight, But darkness will always lose out to light, Cause we've got the Power of Christ on our side."

Fruit of the Spirit - Day 1 - Love

I'm sure you've all heard the Fruit of the Spirit?



But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. Galatians 5:22-23 (NASB)




I am starting a new 'trend' for the month of September, I will be doing a post on each of the fruits of the spirit, every day in the month. (Now, there's only 9, so I won't be going the whole month. but you get the point. ;) )






Today's Fruit of the Spirit is: Love





Now there's lots in The Bible about Love... Wanna know why? Well, it's because our Heavenly Father loves us with a Never Stopping Unbreaking Always and Forever Love (that's from my Jesus Storybook Bible. :) I didn't write that by the way.) Some verses about love are:


“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? If you greet only your brothers, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same? 48 Therefore you are to be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect. Matthew 5:43-48 (NASB)



And my absolute favorite:







New International Version (NIV)


If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing.  If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when completeness comes,what is in part disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians 13 (NIV)



Love is an un-explainable thing, it's something that I can not find words to say, it's wonderful; That's the only word in my vocabulary that I can find that fits LOVE. It says in the above verse: "Love is patient, love in kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the Truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."






Isn't that just absolutely AWESOME?! I simply cannot find any words to explain the AMAZING LOVE.


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"But the greatest of these, is Love."




Monday, August 26, 2013

Just wait.



I have been praying a lot lately, and I realized something...


God doesn't just answer with a loud booming voice from the clouds, (Though, that would be cool, I mean, can you imagine talking to God?) He closes and opens doors, He won't talk to you through a burning bush. (Again, that would be cool.) Sure, it takes awhile to know if He is saying Yes or No, but just keep praying, keep Faith, He will answer! (Just not through a burning bush or a loud booming voice coming from the clouds. ;) ) Just wait.



Short post, I know, but I just really needed to post this...


Also, I wanted to use this verse. Haha! ...Maybe I should make a memory verse page? Oooh! I should do that! (Now I feel like I'm talking to myself. Hah!)

---------------------------------




New International Version (NIV)


9 “This, then, is how you should pray:


“‘Our Father in heaven,
hallowed be your name,
your kingdom come,
your will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.

Give us today our daily bread.
And forgive us our debts,
as we also have forgiven our debtors.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from the evil one.’
Matthew 6:9-13 (NIV)


Friday, August 16, 2013

Almost the end of August... :(



Well guess what? It’s the 16th... Almost the 20th, and if you go to the 20th then fast forward 10 days after... That would be the 30th, then a couple days later... the 1st, then the 2nd...Then the 3rd... How come months are so short? Or maybe it only feels that way... I don’t know. But summer’s almost over and I don’t know what to do. I mean, I can’t wait for Thanksgiving, Christmas and Halloween and all those, but it just goes by so fast, and no matter what you do you can’t slow it down... I’ve realized lately that most of my days are spent worrying about the future, and I never enjoy the day I have...I don’t know why I do that, really, I don’t, it just kind of happens, and I have no way to stop it, and what I really don’t understand is why I can remember one of the verses that I memorized (it helps me stay calm) when I’m happy and not nervous, then when I become nervous, and I take my eyes off Jesus, I can’t remember the verse anymore, I try so hard to remember it, but my mind is blank... Wait, I think I might of answered my own question... The reason I can’t remember those verses, is because my brain makes me take my eyes off Jesus and makes me focus on whatever I’m afraid of...






Anyways, I kind of branched off into other subjects,


but I think you get the point. ;) Now for a quick song then the verse of the day!






- Don’t let it slip on by - Finding Favour -





Even though that’s my first time putting a video on here... I think I did good. :)



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Verse of the day!:







New American Standard Bible (NASB)





How blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked,
Nor stand in the path of sinners,
Nor sit in the seat of scoffers!
But his delight is in the law of the Lord,
And in His law he meditates day and night. Psalm 1-2 (NASB)






Saturday, July 27, 2013

There will be a day

It's already July! What happened to January, April, March, or May? My 12th birthday will be in what, a few months?

What happened to my 10th birthday, and my 11th? Time didn't go this fast in 2012, I don't think it did...

I just don't know what to do anymore. 4 days from now it'll be August. How'd it get to that point so fast?

Summer is almost over. Fall is about to start, what happened to all the time? What happened to those short months?

What happened to Christmas day, Easter, my little sister's birthday? You never get this day back again, enjoy it til' the end.


"There will be a day, with no more tears, no more pain, and no more fears. There will be a day, when the burden of this place, will be no more, and we'll see Jesus face to face." Jeremy Camp

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Verse of the day:


In your unfailing love you will lead

the people you have redeemed.

In your strength you will guide them

to your holy dwelling. Exodus 15:13 (NIV)


Saturday, May 4, 2013

Buddy - My best friend.

A few months ago, my Mommy found out about Autism Service Dogs. They were similar to Seeing eye dogs, and such, but not really... We did a lot of research, and there was also a companion dog, who wouldn't be able to go in public stores and places like that, I basically denied the companion dog, then we finally decided to fill out a form for a service dog... But I kind of felt this knocking in my heart, then I started thinking about companion dogs... So I told Mommy and Daddy and we went to petfinder.com, and looked through a LOT of dogs, we wanted a border collie, because we heard they were intelligent. We found two, Rio and Clooney on a different site, we contacted the owners for both, Rio had been given to a shelter, and Clooney we got a rude response from... Then we went back to petfinder.com and I started looking through the dogs, I scrolled and pressed next page for what seemed hours and hours... Then I saw, him. The perfect dog laying infront of my eyes on the screen, I knew he was the perfect dog. We contacted the owners of the rescue, 4Petsake, and got a time to meet the dog. During that time, I was walking on pins and needles, (not literally. ;) ) then came March 30th 2013, we drove out to meet them at PetSmart. When we got there, we were told he was in the salon, so we patiently waited, (not me of course! Hehe. =]) When he came out... Wow, I just knew he was perfect, just by the look in his eyes, he came over to me and started licking me all over. Soon after we went to the training box as I call it, and the trainer got him to sit within seconds, then we went out to walk him, I tried walking him, but my shoes were really slippery so I was basically being dragged, infact he made a run for the front door. I was afraid to pull back because I was afraid I would hurt him. Soon, we went to get a few things, like a leash and such, and a tag for his collar. Then we filled out paperwork, and they said since he was going to be a service dog, they would give him to us for free. (If your reading this, 4Petsake, THANK YOU SO SO SO MUCH! He is doing great in his new home! =]) Honestly, by their kindness I was starting to get a bit teary-eyed. I would of paid my whole piggy-bank for my new friend, I wish I could of thanked them over and over and over... Soon we came home, he did absolutey great, and he still does to this day. God sent that dog for me, to be my friend. I am so greatful. Thank you 4Petsake. Thank you.


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Cry out, “Save us, God our Savior;
gather us and deliver us from the nations,
that we may give thanks to your holy name,
and glory in your praise.” 1 Chronicles 16:35

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Too grown up...

I'm 11.. But I feel older, too grown up.. I don't get magical pillow rides anymore... I'm almost as tall as my mommy. I have flashbacks of my past, it's like it all slipped on by. Went in a blink, my playtime.. Hiding underneath a blanket with my mommy because it was thundering. Swinging on a swing at my old house playing with ants and having my photo taken... Seeing my grandpa... Jogging with my daddy. Opening a gift and screaming cause it was exactly what I wanted... It has all gone by too fast... I would give 1,0000000$ just to see my grandpa's, poppys face again, photos are memory, I remember the way he looked. I love him and miss him a lot... But the problem is, I can't get those priceless seconds back. My mind mocks me every day, I didn't realize it at first, but it is... It may sound weird but its true... It says "why are you afraid of something so small?! You must not be brave enough for the world." "You should of said goodbye, but you were too scared." It bullies me, yes my mind is controlled by me, but these thoughts. Their not coming from myself. It was my mind who told me to hit myself and that I deserved it. It's like it's acting to be a ruler over me. I want it to stop... And only sometimes can I fight it off, say bible verses, I say this at my mind, "I don't have to be afraid, God is with me, and in the bible it said he'd never forsake me. He's with me always." But my mind shakes it off...

Friday, February 22, 2013

Just Me.

There’s a 11 year old girl, named Sydney, with Aspergers, a form of Autism... That girl is me. I may seem different, while I scream, throw things, pull my hair, but that is not me. My brain tells me I’m different. I’m strange, and all the normal looks I get from strangers, seem like their glares, mean looks. Their not.

All my senses come all in at once, I can’t make them stop, it’s like a current of water. It’s fast and strong, it’s hard to explain, but what I read on a website, is very very true, “Their senses, hear, smell and feel come in - all at once -“ < This is me. I’m very shy, and self-conscious because of this- disorder. 

I can’t seem to explain that to anyone except my family. I’ve been called names, “fool.” “mean.” My eyes fill with tears, more than there should be. 

Everyday, I get sinus, 'stuff coming up my throat’ My brain tells me not to believe what other people say, “It’s a fear.” “It’s not really coming up your throat” “It’s a sensation” My brain keeps saying, “It’s coming up your throat, your going to miserable” I try my hardest not to believe these things. But sometimes that gets to be too much.

I don’t mean to scream. I don’t mean to throw things. I don’t mean to pull my hair. Why am I called these things? People in public look at me as if I’m strange, as I sit impatiently at a restaurant because I’m hungry. They don’t understand that ALL of my senses are hitting me at once, hard. I don’t want to be looked at like that. I don’t want to be talked about as the girl whos different, strange, and weird. I don’t want to do these things. I try NOT to. 

But it’s hard, very hard.






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Verse of the day:



Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, “My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.” Matthew 26:39 (NIV)